Actions and Wors Go Hand in Hand

Actions speak louder than words. But actions that support the words that are spoken are invaluable. -- Deryle Daniels, Jr.

So often we say "Actions speak louder than words" and leave it at that. And it is true. But at the same time, when your actions serve as reinforcement to the words you speak, those words are priceless because they actually have value.
This goes hand in hand with the saying "A man is only as good as his word." If your credibility is shot in any relationship, be it business, romantic, platonic, familial, etc., how can you expect for your words to hold any weight? If you expect to have those around you trust you at all, you have to be able to keep your word. You can not say that you will get something done by a deadline and fail at completing the task. True, life happens, but as you get older and life continues to happen, you learn how to multitask; that is, you learn how to jump life's hurdles while typing that report that has to be on your boss' desk by 9am. You learn how to stretch your money so that, even though you have bills due, you can still take your significant other on the date you promised.
Often, when we do not keep our word, it is not because we can't but because we are being selfish. For those of you who are in college, how many financial obligations have you not honored because you didn't have the money? But very often, you find yourself in the club, at a bar, or at the ABC store 2-3 times a month spending $20+ on drinks. That is selfish. Or how often have you not made time for someone who you say is important to you but, at the drop of a hat, you are at the party? Or, one of the transgressions that too many of us are guilty of, wanting to spend more time in the Word but not taking the time to do so. I know that we have all done these things. I often have to reevaluate how I spend my two most valuable resources: my time and my money.
I cannot say that I am anywhere near where I want or need to be in making sure each of my actions match my words but I can say that I do value my relationships now much more than I used to. The older we get, the more people we know that pass away. And as I see them go, I must say that I do not want to miss another opportunity to see the people I care about on a regular basis. The end.

Litera scripta manet. - Unknown

I Get Up

I aint trynna survive
Im trynna throw my momma in rides
Imma provide for my seed I'm the soil
--J. Cole

I haven't written in a while but I'm writing today. I really just want to update everyone on my blessings. I'm 21 hours from graduating. Crazy, right?! You really have no idea where I'm coming from but to give you an idea, I've been without a home address, not known where I was going to stay at night, lost my great grandma to age, lost my cousin to gang violence, lost friends to death and to life, began relationships, ended relationships, lost love, found love, questioned God, found spirituality, gave my blood, sweat, and tears for 6 brothers, lost my scholarships, regained them, and everything else all within these 4 years. The fact that I even made it to college is a blessing because so many of the cats I grew up with are still at home, dead, or in jail (no disrespect. Still got nothing but love). So, nope, I'm not getting out on time, but I am so thankful that I'm getting out. My father and his father went to college and never made it out. I am going to walk across that stage with my head held high because I will not be another statistic. I really am so ready to make this world better. And I'm going to do just that. Thanks to all you who have ever supported me and those of you who continue to support me. I love life.

Litera scripta manet. - Unknown

Don't Quit

"It's worse but better times seem further and beyond. The top gets higher the more that I climb..." ~ DeWayne Carter

No lie, this Greek stuff gets harder the older I get in it. You come in so excited to make a change in the community and you really want to help people and you want to have fun but disappointments always come. And that is not speaking on behalf of my chapter nor my fraternity. I have had this conversation with Greeks across the country, regardless of organization, race, or region. Everyone who comes into an organization is not always as committed to doing the work of that fraternity/sorority as others who came in with/before/after them. And it is at times frustrating but it is reality. And realizing this, the question those of us who are serious about the frat/sorority must ask ourselves is will we let the body fall because others don't feel like doing the work? Honestly, those of us who know what it is know that when someone didn't speak loud enough while practicing for their "neophyte showcase" (or whatever your organization calls it), you picked up their slack and kept it moving. The same is true in life. If someone isn't pulling their weight, the aims of the fraternity still have to be reached. So even in being tired, don't give up. And that is not just for greek letter organizations but in everything. Be passionate about whatever you do even when others aren't. That is all I have to say.

Litera scripta manet. - Unknown

Full and Still Starving

And I'm grindin until I'm tired
Cause they said you ain't grindin until you tired
So I'm grindin with my eyes wide, lookin to find
A way through the day, a life for the night
-- DeWayne Carter

I really don’t understand my generation’s lack of drive and work ethic. I was sitting in a meeting with a supervisor from one of my two jobs and it was she who planted the seed for this post in my head. It was my second time interacting with her and she mentioned something about the possibility of me taking a leadership role on the team and moving forward. We continued talking and I said “It’s so much harder to succeed these days because everyone is going to college and getting a degree, which is making mine less valuable,” and she replied by saying something along the lines of “That would be true if all you possessed was a degree. What you have and what many people in your generation fail to realize is that old fashioned manners, work ethic and drive will always be valued and that is something that so many of your peers aren’t getting.” So many of us have stacked resumes, but can’t articulate how those positions led to experiences that shaped the way in which we perform. True, I am the president of BBSA, but who cares? If I can’t shape those 4 letters into a reason that Company-X should hire me over the person who was president of WBSA, does it really matter? Didn’t think so.

That goes to speak to ones ability to communicate. Even though every university requires it, a communications course CANNOT teach you how to effectively communicate. It can enhance our ability to do such, but some things must be learned outside of the classroom and communication is one of those things. Sometimes you have to fail in order to succeed, but so many people don’t even take the first steps toward being stable communicators.

I must say, I am disappointed in our generation for the fact that this is true, but all it means is that those of us who have been able to retain our ancestors’ sense of ownership over whatever task is at hand must step up and become that much stronger. Regardless of race, class, or background, a good leader is a good leader and has the ability to step up to the plate when the time comes and, whether he is leading 5 or 500 million, he will do it well. Those of us who are true leaders, let’s do what we do and do it well. Take a sense of ownership and accept nothing less than the best.

Litera scripta manet. - Unknown

You Don’t Know my Name

Today, in my Early African-American Writer's course, Professor Morrissette explained to the class how the great American writer Phillis Wheatley got her name - Phillis from the boat she was brought in on at the age of 6 or 7 and she was branded with Wheatley because of the man who purchased her body. This led me to ask "What is her real name?" Asking that led me to ask "What is my real name?"

I am Deryle and will always be Deryle. I will always be the proud descendant of the most strongest, smartest, most beautiful people in the world. I will always be the great-great grandson of slaves. But what meaning would my name have had if my people's cultures had never been erased from their memories? What if we had been allowed to at least keep our culture? Why force me to forget who I am? I want to know who I am and where I am from. We were not only robbed of our freedom, we were robbed of ourselves. That, my brothers and sisters, can never be replaced with reparations or apologies. It is something that we must search for.

To me, the worst part is that those persons who willingly migrated to this country know where they came from and take their names for granted. The Italians, Jews, Germans, Japanese, Africans, and Arabs who are have surnames like Russo, Goldstein, Suzuki, Guseh, and Ali. These names have meaning not only to these people, but to their ancestors as well. Would my name have any meaning to my ancestors 8 generations back? I think not. Outside of America, I have nothing. That just goes to say that, those of you who are able to trace your heritage back to a specific place, be thankful and be proud. I am proud, but my pride is in an entire continent, not in one village, nation, or even region.

Litera scripta manet. - Unknown

Dead Ends vs. Highways

Life doesn't always go according to plan. That's real life. But sometimes our plans aren't the ones that life should be going according to. The route that my life is taking in 2010, in every aspect, is one that is keeping me excited because it is a very new path. I am nervous but at the same time, the path is fresh and just full of opportunity. Not a long post, just an observation. Don't push away old paths that are working, but don't be afraid to give up dead ends for highways that have the potential to never end.

Litera scripta manet. - Unknown

What is Your X?

"It's funny how x can change everything" - Drake

I changed.

At first I was quick to say I didn't but then I realized that change is a necessary part of life. I cannot make anything happen or keep anything from happening in my life. I am merely a piece in God's game of chess. He is not even the king in the game but more realistically, He is the one moving the pieces. Each situation I enter is because He has allowed me to move in that direction in order for me to get to another position on the board of life. While in each square he places me in, be it the positive black squares or the negative white ones, I go through some degree of growth, based on the amount of opposition I face while in that square. But, at the end of the day, I come out of each square, and, even if I take a step back, I am strategically moving forward.

I can't choose the level of change I go through. If I could, why would I not just remain static and ignorant? The more wisdom one obtains, the more sadness he will ultimately feel in life. But in the end it helps because he will be able to make better decisions that will increase his happiness, productivity, and other key aspects of life.

The worst part of change is that, in order to gain one thing, something else must be lost. Loss alone is never positive but change, loss, and gain are a package that can only be bought in a bundle. There will always be a level of challenge that you are faced with as you change but as long as the good outweighs the bad and the person/entity in question moves onward and upward, he cannot truly be faulted.

To take steps toward change is sometimes selfish but change is often gradual and goes unnoticed, thus giving surrounding parties a chance to adapt. The process which served as the catalyst for the most visible change in my adult life, however, was not gradual. It was drastic and intense. It did not give me nor those around me a chane to get a grip on it, but instead, I came out with a walk that said "This is who I have grown to be. I am refined and I am focused. Take it or leave it." I will not claim that it was fair but it was nothing short of real.

“I cannot change the past. I cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way. The only thing I can do is play on the one string that I have. I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it.” I embraced this lesson during my most drastic period of growth and now I realize that I am in charge of my attitude. The transformation has occurred. It cannot be reversed, only refined. The question at hand now is, in the words of Bro. Kwame Akeem Carrol, "How you gonna act?"

Litera scripta manet. - Unknown