We Used To Be Tight

You ever lose a friend?

Not "lose" in the sense of death. I mean "lose" like "Damn. We used to be so tight. Now we don't talk at all. What happened?"Last week I kicked it w/ some of my boys from home. Today I talked with my best friend from high school who I haven't spoken with since December. I really miss my friends even though we have taken different paths.

I have lost too many friends during my time at UNCG. Some I lost the moment I graduated high school, others I lost gradually as I worked to graduate from college. It really isn't a good part of life, but I guess it is a necessary one.

As we grow people change. I sure as hell have changed. Sometimes we change at a rate that mirrors that of our friends. Sometimes we don't. I was thinking about grad school when I graduated from high school. Now that I'm preparing to graduate from college, I'm planning my steps toward being stable enough to have a family and retire by 50. Humbly speaking, I am always mentally ahead of most of those who are demographically beside me.

But that makes life hard. I get frustrated with people not having aspirations. You don't need to know where you will be step by step in 10 years but you need to be taking some steps toward somewhere. Complacency is not attractive. But I find that so many people who are initially interesting lose their appeal because they have no real life goals. "I want to be rich" or "I want to get married" isn't enough. You have to know what you want and how you plan to get there. Otherwise you are just going through the motions, only to eventually hit a wall that you can't scale because you've been taking baby steps toward nowhere your entire life.

That's why I lose most of my friends. There are a certain relationships that I let go of because it just wasn't there anymore. But in those situations, I still say "Damn. We used to be so tight."

To everyone who I consider a friend, ever considered a friend, or will consider a friend, I will always give you my first and my last. That is a promise..

Litera scripta manet. - Unknown